Fear of visibility could be a problem to overcome.
“I am experiencing the biggest crisis of confidence! I want to hide under the duvet! It feels like a nightmare in which I’m like Spike in Notting Hill when he opens the front door in his underpants to the aggressive snapping paparazzi of the world’s press… except in my scene, unlike Spike, I am terrified AND I am completely naked!”
This is pretty much verbatim my melodramatic and anguished call to my friend after I had uploaded my first video onto Facebook.
My whole body was in a state of hyper-vigilance and terror. I thought I was going to die.
I didn’t die of course.
But I did confront the fear of visibility that so many coaches experience when they decide to launch their business into the online space.
The desire to share your message, promote your services and serve at the highest level so often gets usurped by the crippling fear of exposure and vulnerability.
And then, not only are we caught up in fear, we waste time beating ourselves up for not having the confidence to just do it already!
I used to drive myself nuts with this!!
When it comes to visibility and shining your big beautiful light into the world it’s worth understanding that your fear is natural. Be kind to yourself because that fear is actually your subconscious survival response kicking in. Your lizard brain is wired to protect you from predators so it’s a deeply ingrained survival instinct to stay hidden and avoid being seen.
On top of instinctual reasons, you can probably add in a few limiting beliefs that you collected in childhood which also fuel your fear of being “too much” or “not enough” which keeps you small and in hiding.
However, since we’re now adults sitting on our laptops in the comfort of our homes, and the risk of being attacked by a bear is zero to none, our brains make shit up.
We create new predators called potential rejection, judgment, or criticism to fear.
We compare ourselves to the “gurus” out there already rocking the world with their ‘stuff’ and we believe that we have nothing new to say.
I’ve had clients tell me “it’s all been said before! Who is going to listen to me!?”.
Truth is, you don’t have to try and reinvent the wheel here!
What you’re saying, even if it’s been said before, is unique because it’s YOU who is saying it. You’re bringing a fresh newness to the message because it’s infused with your heart and your unique experience and perspective
We also hold back because we don’t want to come off as pushy or salesy, for fear of being perceived as arrogant, or out of integrity so rather than just being authentic and sharing the message that’s in our hearts we don’t say anything at all – we hide.
A great reframe here. Instead of making your visibility strategy all about attracting clients (which heightens attachment to the outcome and creates yet more fear) make the aim about consistently sharing your message, giving value, and growing your confidence a bit at a time.
Many coaches struggle to stay consistently visible because they’re too focused on “What can I get?” and that is draining because your energy is in survival mode – it’s exhausting!
Instead, raise your energy, and your frequency, by focusing on “What can I give?” And soon enough you’ll be inspired to show up and share your message.
You have the experience, knowledge, and skills to powerfully transform lives. You understand the needs and pains of your ideal clients because you’ve been where they are, you get it!
Ask yourself “What do I wish someone had told me back then when I was going through my struggles?”
I get very passionate about the topic because I know your perfect clients are out there, waiting for you to show up.
Help them find you by showing up and shining your light.
If you’re unclear on exactly who your perfect client is or you’re stuck on what your message is then I have training that guides you through the process that I take my clients through to get the breakthrough clarity they need. You can grab it here: https://sanaefloyd.com/free-shine-a-light-challenge/
So what happened to my fear of visibility crisis?
Well, I didn’t die. In fact the exact opposite. I grew, evolved, and expanded.
I picked myself up, shook it off, and did it again! I created a new video and posted it, shut my laptop, and danced to Justin Timberlake’s “Can’t Stop The Feeling” to interrupt my fear spiral.
Then I sat back down, opened my laptop, and started working on the content of my next video…And I just kept doing it until one day I noticed that I no longer felt fear. I was enjoying myself. I felt stronger, more confident and I was sharing my message.
And before long, I started seeing results. I attracted my dream clients who saw my videos and reached out to me to work with me.
Set yourself up for success with baby steps and be kind to yourself by celebrating every win, no matter how small.